We go through a cortisol response; you know… stress hormone, it can be really damaging. But the reality is, who cares what happens when we are in the middle of it? I found myself thinking this and other odd thoughts today standing in the kitchen of Loree’s home. A home that just lost the head of the house. A home that felt so warm in its surroundings and décor, and through the comfort of people within; yet had such a strange emptiness…. as if in all of this comfort and warmth, you could already feel the gap that was left by Steve. A silence of loss.
I believe in a supernatural war. One that was characterized so well by C.S Lewis in the Screwtape Letters so many years ago. One that tells me that right now the pain and sorrow, are opportunity for bad things to happen to those who are left behind. BUT… Right now, I must say, Loree is one of the most resilient people I have seen in the middle of this supernatural war. Right now, when she is the most vulnerable to thinking bad things, this woman is being lifted up by the spirit of God and is walking in a beautiful faith and comfort. I adore her spirit.
I loved Steve, and still do. I love the memory of this guy who was always so peaceful and calm. I never heard him in an upset tone, and if there was ever a response to negativity by him, it was to find cause for a chuckle and a smile. A servant heart through and through. Man, he helped me out on so many countless occasions without a second thought. A true servant… one who would kneel to wash another man’s feet if needed… couple that with the fact that he was a carpenter, and boy he begins to remind me of someone else.
Follow God’s Example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Eph 5:1-2
I don’t know if Steve actually tried to be such a good servant, I kind of think he was just that way. Hard work and a giving spirit made him the kind of guy who would “just get things done”. This family had been dealt a rough deal already. The economic turns of the past decade had stolen Steve’s passion as a custom home builder, and later stole a successful career from Loree (I guess I benefitted from that :); but they didn’t complain, they pushed on, and they found joy and love and peace on the new path.
Lane, their son, has always been one of the most respectful kids you’d meet. Never an arrogant or self centered response, always understanding proper manners when addressing adults. A baseball player with depth, and like his father, a servant heart. As a young teenager, I don’t know the difficulty that he will face, other than knowing I still consider that I am learning life lessons from my father. That makes me think Lane will have the hardest time, but… back to the title of this post.
When we lose the ones we love. Is it not our responsibility to be the hand of God? I recall having this discussion in a seminar I attended years ago on healing. When God answers prayer, he tends to do so through people. Most of His prayers are answered through people. Which then begs the question of WHO do we expect God to use to answer our prayers?
“God please bring the right people around Lane and Loree to help them to continue to trust in you, and to feel loved, and to feel at peace.”
Does it not make sense, that if we feel the tug on our hearts to say this prayer, that we would also be the people who are in God’s plan, to be the answer. I sometimes wonder “Why did I pray that just then?” about a request for intervention from God, only to think that my prayer might have been inspired (not of my own brain), and if so, then would it not actually be a call to myself to take action and be the intervention? I think that this is more simple of a truth than we are willing to accept. But in considering it, I believe we are all called to be part of this body, part of the hands and feet, and in a moment of loss, we are designed to be the hands and feet.
So I ask you, in your life is there loss that deserves your attention. I see needs that will come for this family that are not here yet, and will require assistance. Needs that will show in their own due time, and ones that I feel equipped to help with. I tell you, I am heart broken right now for Loree and Lane and for my loss of a guy who I loved to see walk in my office. But when I think if what my loss must feel like in comparison to theirs… I just want to cry, and I want to be angry, and I want to curse some, and blame God… and myself… and I want to be sad. I really want to be sad. But then, I see how their pain is being comforted, and it makes me cry tears of sad joy.
My wife has a girl who she went to school with who lost a child. This girl is an amazing writer. I believe an atheist, so she doesn’t have the hope that I hold on to. Which makes me sad for her, but I must say, her ability and willingness to share her pain is comforting.
When we lose those we love… we become better people to those around us.
I think that is the statement that sums up what I have seen in the last day, and it is the thing that warms me to the hope of a brilliant future in a place called heaven.
Be blessed and be well. – Dr, E
You can reach out to Loree through HealthSprout (firstname.lastname@example.org) or by stopping into our office. 8256 Main Street Woodstock GA 30188